I truly believe crickets are of the devil. The Lord may have created them, but when he cast Lucifer out, I believe the crickets went with him. There is NO way Noah's wife would allow crickets on the ark. I just can't believe it to be true.
I hate crickets. Loathe them. I for real have an unhealthy problem with crickets. When I hear one that I think may be too close for comfort, I freak. Seriously, like a panic attack. My heart starts beating too fast, it's hard to breathe, I get a nervous sweat and I become paralyzed, especially when I don't know where it is hiding. Once it appears jumping around in my sight, I either run for the hills screaming like a banchee, or I whip out my handy can of super strength outdoor Raid (yes, even inside) and I use 1/2 a can and spray it til it's dead. I am not joking, I know it's weird, and I know it sounds like I'm being dramatic, but ask Marty. I seriously need therapy about crickets!
So ever since the infestation of crickets that happened to my home in the summer of 2005, Marty has been pretty good at doing the perimeter spray. Everyday this summer, starting in May, I reminded him to do it, and he put it off and put it off. Then he just used this 6-week stuff that we happened to have. I told him and told him to go to Home Depot and get the super duty, extra strength Raid stuff, and he put it off and put it off. Low and behold my people, last night I heard a cricket in the basement. Thank GOD it was not upstairs. But just knowing a cricket is jumping around, having a blast in MY basement with MY stuff and MY clothes is just so irritating I could spit. Or scream. I'm not kidding, it's a little hard to breathe right now just thinking about needing to do laundry tonight. I honestly won't do it until I can be sure there are no alive crickets in my basement. Or dead ones for that matter. I can't even stand to see the lifeless shell of a cricket. I want to vomit now.
Am I ridiculous or what? It's a freaking CRICKET. A black, 2 inch insect. I'm not afraid of spiders. I mean I get a little creeped out, but I can kill a spider. Not a daddy long legs. Ew. They might wrap their legs around my shoe and eat through it or something. But crickets will crunch when you step on it, and ooze and goo...they also can jump like 6 feet and they rub their legs together just to annoy us and keep us awake. Darn them. DARN THEM.
2 comments:
Oh Sarah - You are not crazy. We've talked about this, crickets are demons. They all need to burn. I hate them, the same unheathly hate. THIS IS CRAZY because we have not had one cricket in our house all summer and then LAST NIGHT, I kid you not...I seriously think this is crazy... I was on the computer, and there is this minor hole in our siding where anything can get in that we stuffed with mouse stuff just in case...anyways, out of this hole I hear a cricket. It was weakened though by our perimeter spray stuff...I seriously screamed and ran through the house. I hate crickets. People dont understand. They love the sound of crickets in the summer. They have never had crickets in their clothes, or an ingfestation of them. We are right and they are wrong, crickets are the devil :) lol They are black, and they can jump, and they move fast and they are freaking huge. I hate them, hate them, hate them. My prayers are with you sister :)
I'm sorry, but I like crickets. Their sound reminds me of spending the night at my grandma's in the country.
Also, I am so allergic to Raid and all other insecticides. I get covered in hives, my eyes swell shut, my lips look like they've been collagen injected and my throat begins to swell shut. Remind me not to hang out with you...lol.
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