Well, it is exactly two weeks later that I am back here to write down my thoughts. I don't know what keeps me from blogging, oh that's right, lack of time, energy, ideas, etc.
Isn't it funny the people God puts in your life? Sometimes you don't even realize what someone may really mean to you until one day BOOM! God does something amazing and you are able to look back at that friendship and say, WOW, God really put us together for a reason! Of course, I'm talking about a specific friend but I want to keep it mysterious, hehehehe....oh, the truth shall be revealed in time, but all that matters now is that my friend knows that God put you in my life (and mine in yours) and there is a reason we managed to stay connected over all these years, when quite frankly, we have not really hung out all that much lately and we kind of have seperate groups of friends! We should have known that day in 2004 when our words were brought forth that there was a reason we were told together!
Well, my friends. I think I'm closer to knowing what God might have in store for me. A little birdie text messaged me this verse yesterday exactly when I was looking up verses with the same sort of meaning:
"He is able to do immeasurably more than we can ask, seek or imagine." Ephesians 3:20
Thanks, friend.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
I'm almost 30
The big day has come and gone. Now in adulthood, birthdays don't hold the same excitement as they did, say 20 years ago! Marty felt the need to remind me I am more than 1/2 way to 50...ok, well, he's 32, so whatever! He also wished me Happy Almost 30th birthday. I still have to turn 29 next year, but you know, 28 is a weird age. It's like limbo between having fun in your 20's and succumbing to the responsibility of work, life and kids in your 30's. He also thought it would be funny to add that he heard that having babies after 30 increases risks, so we should crank a few more out real quick...yeah, no thanks!
I am making a birthday resolution to take more vitamins, spend more time playing with Sammy rather than stressing about my messy house, and I need to give my anxiety, stress and depression (that the enemy sends to me through the mess that is Alexis's mother) to the Lord. I think less caffeine might help with that, too!
Whoever actually tunes into my blog, keep my family in prayer in regards to Alexis. She is being used as a pawn so bad, and all it does is hurt her. I just want to drive down and pick her up, bring her back and keep her safe from the ridiculous antics of her mother and grandmother. They conspire together to see what benefits them so that Marty's mom can get as much time with Alexis as possible. She stabs her own son in the back to befriend this manipulator, and it causes so much unnecessary strife. Pray for a miracle and for God's hand to move in this situation quickly.
I promise, my blogs are soon to be more positive, thought-provoking, genius-at-work writing that you won't be bored to tears by. Love you all!
I am making a birthday resolution to take more vitamins, spend more time playing with Sammy rather than stressing about my messy house, and I need to give my anxiety, stress and depression (that the enemy sends to me through the mess that is Alexis's mother) to the Lord. I think less caffeine might help with that, too!
Whoever actually tunes into my blog, keep my family in prayer in regards to Alexis. She is being used as a pawn so bad, and all it does is hurt her. I just want to drive down and pick her up, bring her back and keep her safe from the ridiculous antics of her mother and grandmother. They conspire together to see what benefits them so that Marty's mom can get as much time with Alexis as possible. She stabs her own son in the back to befriend this manipulator, and it causes so much unnecessary strife. Pray for a miracle and for God's hand to move in this situation quickly.
I promise, my blogs are soon to be more positive, thought-provoking, genius-at-work writing that you won't be bored to tears by. Love you all!
Monday, February 4, 2008
Oh, Monday.
For once I am somewhat glad it is Monday. I had a terrible past 8 days. I cannot divulge too much, but let's just say I had a "woe-is-me" time last weekend (not the one that just past)...Satan just loves to kick you when you are down. I was a little down about some friendship stuff and thought well, I do have these friends over here, blah blah blah...who come to find out on Sunday neglected to invite me along to hang out Saturday, once again, totally didn't even realize I wasn't there hanging out with them. I was really frustrated by my revelations about my friendships, but had to get over it and head out on a two-day business trip with my boss. That sounds much weirder than it is. I love my boss. We have a ton in common and she is a great friend. I can tell her anything without being judged. I wanted to visit my grandma on Saturday, but Sammy had an ear infection and my uncle smokes, so I didn't want to take him around it, not to mention he was being a Mr. Grumpy Pants.
So Tuesday evening I got back from my trip and about an hour later my mom called to tell me my grandma had a heartattack. My life with Grandma around literally flashed before my eyes because I have been feeling this coming for a few months now, but really thought she had a few years left. Two hours after that call, my mom called to tell me she didn't make it. I literally felt the world stop. It was all so fast, I didn't even get to say goodbye, and I immediately thought about how I should've visited over the weekend. She lives less than 10 minutes away, what has been my excuse? Working full-time really made it difficult and I reminded myself that I did visit much more often, at least once a week, when I worked less. My grandma was 77, most people in my family live to see 90 at least. She had declining health and macular degeneration, so I understand she is in a better place and doesn't have to deal with blindness, arthritis, pneumonia, or any other ailments she was fighting off all the time. Still, it has been very rough. Sometimes, grandma's pass, and you hug your friend and give your sympathy, and many are pretty strong about it because it is a thing of nature. But, this was different. I was so close to her, and of course I thought of all the should've, could've, would've's immediately. She LOVED my children so good...telling Alexis by phone sucked. She adored my grandma.
Fast forward past details...Wednesday everything was taken care of. We were given a 20 minute family viewing with grandma, and then they sent her body off to be cremated. That creeps me out a little. But, I know she is not there. It's just a shell.
Thursday---I was a mess. I stayed home, kept Sammy home and spent time with him, went to breakfast with my mom, shared memories of Grandma, visited my uncle who lived with her and had found her. Thursday night though, God sent me His condolences in the form of my friend from college, Chrissy. I miss my Evangel friends so much and had been thinking about them a lot over the last week since my friend revelations. Chrissy's plane got delayed til Friday morning, so I met her at her hotel and we talked til about 2 am, then I had to go home so I wouldn't get snowed in. It was such a good time and I really needed it. My friends here have been wonderful and supportive as well. Thanks, everyone for your lovin' :)
Anyway, back to work today. I took Friday as well, since I got three days of bereavement pay anyway. That was a good rest for me, although I was sick over the weekend and I am exhausted. Tomorrow is the big B-day. No, not 30. Just 28. Marty's 32 was Saturday. We might go on a hot date tomorrow. Well, make it mild. Here's to a better week than last.
So Tuesday evening I got back from my trip and about an hour later my mom called to tell me my grandma had a heartattack. My life with Grandma around literally flashed before my eyes because I have been feeling this coming for a few months now, but really thought she had a few years left. Two hours after that call, my mom called to tell me she didn't make it. I literally felt the world stop. It was all so fast, I didn't even get to say goodbye, and I immediately thought about how I should've visited over the weekend. She lives less than 10 minutes away, what has been my excuse? Working full-time really made it difficult and I reminded myself that I did visit much more often, at least once a week, when I worked less. My grandma was 77, most people in my family live to see 90 at least. She had declining health and macular degeneration, so I understand she is in a better place and doesn't have to deal with blindness, arthritis, pneumonia, or any other ailments she was fighting off all the time. Still, it has been very rough. Sometimes, grandma's pass, and you hug your friend and give your sympathy, and many are pretty strong about it because it is a thing of nature. But, this was different. I was so close to her, and of course I thought of all the should've, could've, would've's immediately. She LOVED my children so good...telling Alexis by phone sucked. She adored my grandma.
Fast forward past details...Wednesday everything was taken care of. We were given a 20 minute family viewing with grandma, and then they sent her body off to be cremated. That creeps me out a little. But, I know she is not there. It's just a shell.
Thursday---I was a mess. I stayed home, kept Sammy home and spent time with him, went to breakfast with my mom, shared memories of Grandma, visited my uncle who lived with her and had found her. Thursday night though, God sent me His condolences in the form of my friend from college, Chrissy. I miss my Evangel friends so much and had been thinking about them a lot over the last week since my friend revelations. Chrissy's plane got delayed til Friday morning, so I met her at her hotel and we talked til about 2 am, then I had to go home so I wouldn't get snowed in. It was such a good time and I really needed it. My friends here have been wonderful and supportive as well. Thanks, everyone for your lovin' :)
Anyway, back to work today. I took Friday as well, since I got three days of bereavement pay anyway. That was a good rest for me, although I was sick over the weekend and I am exhausted. Tomorrow is the big B-day. No, not 30. Just 28. Marty's 32 was Saturday. We might go on a hot date tomorrow. Well, make it mild. Here's to a better week than last.
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